Are Women Distractions?

Joe* was organizing an event at his church that spanned several nights. In an effort to include as many young people as possible, Joe planned to use both boys and girls as ushers.

A male leader in Joe's church took Joe aside and questioned him about using girls as ushers, telling him he didn't think it was a good idea. Joe was taken off-guard by this because he saw no rules against female ushers anywhere in the Bible or within his church's own policies. So, he asked this leader why he didn't think it was a good idea.

This church leader had one answer: "They are a distraction."

Wait, what? Women and girls can't be ushers in a church because they are a distraction?

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

No, Mr. Church Leader, women and girls are not distractions.....the problem is you. Mr. Church Leader, you have a problem with lust. Don't try to cover your sin up by putting a label on all the female people in the congregation. Your sin problem is HUGE and is leading to the abuse of other people.

You are denying women the opportunity to serve Jesus because YOU lust after them every time they walk by.

You are denying women the respect you are commanded to give them (I Timothy 5:2) because YOU lust after them every time they walk by.

You are potentially causing another church member (Joe in this case) to stumble in their faith because YOU can't control your thought process around all women.

If women are denied the opportunity to serve Jesus because church leadership finds them distracting, it's the church leadership who has the problem and the women should not be punished because of it. It's like telling them, "Because we find you attractive and are distracted by your beauty, you do not get to serve Jesus."

Oh, my.

This mindset has to stop. It's part of the problem. In I Timothy 5:2, Paul admonishes Timothy to treat the older women as mothers and the younger women as sisters, with absolute purity. So, church leaders who find women so distracting that they can't so much as "allow" her to serve as an usher need to examine their own hearts and get their lustful thoughts under control - or resign as unqualified.

This shows me that women in evangelical churches are held captive to the unholy, ungodly, sinful thoughts of men and this is dangerous. It's akin to making allowance for sin...like saying the pastor can't control his thoughts so we'll control the women instead of dealing with the sinful lusts of the pastor.

Do you realize how common this is?
I shudder.
If you're interested in knowing more about how this subtle attitude hurts women and hinders ministry, click here.

~Tricia

Get Outta My Church!

We had attended a new church for a couple months and were initially glad to find a church that seemed to preach the Truth. It has been a difficult journey since moving to MD over five years ago. Even conservative Baptist churches are not preaching the Word; they are steeped in Secular Humanism.

So, we found this little church in a tight neighborhood and the "senior pastor" preached mostly expository messages. He veered off into opinion occasionally, but I've learned to tune that out. We even said "Amen" aloud a couple times. The people were friendly, a couple women even hugged me. They seemed sincere. They did not make announcements or utilize a bulletin of any sort, so we never felt we knew what was going on other than Sunday morning. I thought that was strange.

One Sunday, we got there to find that the "senior pastor" was out of town and his son, the "assistant pastor" would be preaching. This son is very green and clearly needs some homiletics training. But, we aren't going to cause a fuss over an ill-experienced preacher who is still learning to preach. We all start somewhere. However, one thing he said in his sermon struck a sour cord with me, but it had nothing to do with God's Word or God at all. He said our military men and women go into battle thinking they could never die; that they think it could never happen to them. He said they just go into battle with a flippant attitude. I shifted in my chair. My son had gone into battle....and before he did, he had to sign over power of attorney to us. He knew what could happen to him. He wasn't flippant.

Afterward, when this young man and his wife were greeting us at the door, I said - in passing, not as a confrontation - that our military men and women go into battle fully aware of what could happen to them.....but they go anyway. He said, "Oh, sure, sure.....yeah."

A few weeks later, the son preached again. This time, he butchered James 1, completely misrepresenting the passage and in a very damaging way. We felt bad for the congregation. At the door, as he shook his hand, my husband invited the young man to take a second look at James 1, read it over slowly and simply take a second look. Who would reject an invitation to take a second look at a passage of Scripture? Humility requires that we all respond positively to such an invitation.

However, the next day, my husband got an email from the "senior pastor" telling us that since David and I both met his son with opposition, and because he read my blog, we were no longer welcome to attend his church.

Now, because of red flags in their teachings and practices I was already seeing, I, personally, had already realized I could never put my full heart into that ministry. But, his reasons for kicking us out make no sense.

My threefold rebuttal:

Disagreeing with someone with zero military experience about the mindset of our military men and women is not opposition, it's education. Clearly, this kid is not teachable. Unteachable people are not qualified to preach/teach.

Inviting someone to take a second look at a passage of Scripture is not opposition, it's an act of love.

And concerning my blog, well, all I can say is, dude, you're not the first pastor I've scared off and it's highly likely you won't be the last.

I firmly believe every person who presents God's Word in any way, shape or form must be up for questioning. I will question everyone. Never one time did Jesus admonish someone not to question Him.

Any pastor who is not open to questioning, but frames any question or comment (and even invitations to look more closely at the Word) as "opposition" is not qualified to be in any pulpit.

I suspect - and this is pure speculation on my part - that this pastor is too afraid that the women in his congregation might find out they can have independent thoughts outside of their husbands' and pastors' control and he will have none of that. Every cult has to subdue the women at all times.

Carry on, little cult, carry on. One day you will know the truth.
~Tricia

Whose Word is it Anyway?

I heard a young man preach last Sunday. I think the young man has potential, but he has a lot to learn about preaching God's Word. Throughout his sermon, he repeated that this is God's Word, this is what God has said, etc. He reiterated this several times, yet when it came to the actual Word, he changed what God said. He turned it into his own words, but kept God's name on it, passing it off as God's. He preached his word to the people, claiming it was God's Word, but it wasn't at all.

Here's what he did. He took James 1:2, which says, "...count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience," and he changed it to say, "...count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith, when you have the proper response, when handled right, produces patience."

Do you see the difference? He added "when you have the proper response, when handled right" to God's Word, effectively turning his sermon into one of Secular Humanism instead of one of God.

Whose Word is it? When we muddy the clear, pure waters of God's Word with our own secular, humanistic ideas and pass them off as God's, we are not only leading the sheep down a dangerous path, we are jeopardizing our own theology, making us more vulnerable to the rampant false teaching that plagues our churches today.

Be sure, it is God's Word and only God's Word will accomplish His purpose.

Listen to every sermon with a critical ear.

Take no one's word for God's Word.

Look things up for yourself.

If a preacher changes God's Word to suit an agenda (usually an attempt to control people's behavior), do not listen to that preacher.

You have the right and responsibility to question anyone who is teaching God's Word. If they do not receive your questions, they are not worthy or qualified to deliver God's Word.

Be like the Bereans, who were praised for looking things up for themselves. This was no small feat on their part, either, since #1, the entire Bible had not yet been written and #2, there weren't printed copies or a local book store to buy one from. STILL, they looked things up for themselves.....Acts 17:11-12a, "they searched the Scriptures daily to see if these things were so. Therefore, many of them believed..."

~Tricia

Is the Church Producing Weak Men?

I was recently asked, "Is the church producing weak men?"

My answer:

The church is failing to make strong disciples of either gender. It's not a question of whether men are being made strong in their faith, it's a question of whether any Christian is being made strong in their faith. A better question is, "Is the church equipping the saints for the work of the ministry?" and "Is the church making strong disciples who are grounded in doctrine?"

Asking whether the church is producing weak men is ignoring at least half the people there. No church leadership should be asking this question. I believe it's part of the problem. If we focus on one gender and attempt to produce strength in only one gender, we are weakening the entire church.

In Ephesians 4:11-13, it says, "And he gave some, apostles, some, prophets, some, evangelists and some, pastors and teachers, for the equipping of the saints, for the work of the ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ: till we all come in the unity of the faith, and of the knowledge of the Son of God, unto a perfect (mature) person, unto the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ."

In these verses, there is no gender specification. While some might want to apply it in a gender specific way, it simply is not written in a gender specific way. Such an application would be amiss.

Now, to go back to the initial question of whether the church is producing strong disciples. There are weaknesses in the making of disciples in the church and that weakness is rooted in Secular Humanism, which is the primary thing being taught in a good number of evangelical churches. Secular Humanism comes wrapped in patriarchy and has been devastating to our churches as well as our sons and daughters.

My husband and I didn't raise our kids in a gender-specific way. By this I mean we didn't have different rules for the boys or the girls. Everyone had to live by the same rules in our house. There was no idea that "boys will be boys," meaning they got away with certain actions just because they were boys. Our girls got in as much trouble as our boys. Our girls got as dirty as our boys. Neither gender got special treatment. Everyone had to be kind, thoughtful, obedient, compassionate, and humble. And "Even Steven" has never been welcome at our house.

Many Christian people actually encourage men and boys to define themselves through strength, aggression and competitiveness. This hides the real character of Jesus Christ and leaves our men and boys feeling like they don't have a model of masculinity that allows for fear or grief or tenderness or the occasional sadness that can overwhelm any of us at times. To teach men and boys to define themselves through strength, aggression and competitiveness is faulty because Jesus says his strength is made perfect in weakness and we are to treat others as more important than ourselves. So, to define a "man" as one who shows strength, aggression and competitiveness is to misrepresent all men as ones who cannot identify with Christ at all.

If you want to save our children - save our sons - save our daughters, give them Jesus and realize their gender means nothing in light of the gospel. Kids don't need special treatment based on gender. Kids need Jesus and the life-changing power and news of the gospel of God.

Stop the influx of Secular Humanism into our pulpits and preach Jesus and this will make strong disciples of each gender....and you won't care what gender anyone is!

~Tricia