A Personal Story of Spiritual Abuse (A Glimpse inside The Agape Players)

 

I had been a Christian for just a few short months when I auditioned and was accepted to travel with a singing/drama group, The Agape Players. I knew nothing of the Bible, did not know how to study or articulate anything outside of my own experience, and even that was cloudy.

What I had done before going with the group was memorize Scripture and hear my pastor tell me over and over again that I didn't have to take anyone's word for anything the Bible said because I could look it up for myself.

Finding things out for myself was a completely new concept for me. For me to be considered as someone who could actually know something was a foreign idea to me. All my life I had few choices. I generally felt confused and alone, despite the fact that I had seven siblings. My dad was an alcoholic, very violent and reminded me often how stupid I was.

Finding out I could actually read the Bible for myself and make my own spiritual decisions was beyond my comprehension. But, I watched and listened and learned. And, unexpectedly to even myself, I grew in my faith.

When I got to Tampa, Florida to begin training with The Agape Players, the young man who had taken me to church to hear about Jesus, the young man to whom I was engaged by then, committed suicide by throwing himself off the town's water tower. I was in Florida; I could not travel back to Ohio for his funeral or for any comfort from home.

The leaders of The Agape Players, Rocky and Alice Adkins,  took me to their hotel suite that night and tried to comfort me. All I remember doing is sleeping and crying. The next day, it was practice and rehearsals as usual. But I was undone. Except for my grandpa when I was nine years old, no one I knew had ever died. I had no idea what to feel/say/do/react. I cried inconsolably at times without seeing it coming.

Later that day, the day after I found out he was dead, Alice came to get me and she sat me down and took my face in her hands and told me to stop crying right then and there. She got very close to my face and told me I had cried all night and enough was enough and I was to never, ever cry about this again, nor was I to speak of him ever again. She said I was being ridiculous and disruptive with all this crying and she wasn't going to have it. She said that if she ever caught me crying or talking about him, I would be sent home immediately.

And that was that, at least Alice thought so. But, I did cry, at night, alone. And in the shower. And in the bathroom. And whenever I was alone, (which was not often since we even showered together some of the time, in the name of saving water).

Then they put me on "The Diet." I weighed 98 pounds when I first arrived, but had gained 3 pounds and was now "grossly overweight" at 101 pounds. So, I was put on "The Diet" to lose all this gross weight. Because I had been, according to Rocky and Alice, so careless with my weight and gained those horrid three pounds, they decided I should then weigh 96 pounds, losing an additional two pounds in hopes that it would teach me my lesson, so suddenly I was an even worse five whole, gross pounds overweight. This would not do.

Alice took me aside and told me that I was out of God's will because God said that "a false balance is an abomination to the Lord," quoting Proverbs 11:1, and that "a just weight is his delight." and I was not pleasing God at all in being so overweight and He would deal with me if I didn't lose that five pounds and weigh 96 pounds. They had public weigh-ins where many times, the guys weighed the girls and announced the weight out loud for all to hear. Imagine my horror when this guy said, out loud, "Oh, wow, still at 101! C'mon, girl, you have to lose this!" I would hang my head in shame, then secretly eat chocolate.

But, something didn't feel right to me. I could not have told you what it was to save my life, but it just didn't feel right. I didn't know what else to do, so I questioned Alice. She and Rocky had set themselves up as the authorities in my life. They owned The Agape Players, they had all authority over my daily schedule, my diet and what I talked and grieved about. I simply asked Alice why God wanted me to weigh 96 pounds and where in the Bible I could find this information for myself.

And Alice, always filled with drama, began to sing. I felt awkward. She and I were the only people in the room, yet she was singing and that felt odd to me. After she sang, she looked at me very closely and said, "You will not, you cannot, understand these things. You are such a sinner. You are still a sinner. I am not a sinner any more. I have grown to the point of no more sin in my spiritual walk. This is why I am in charge here. This is why God gave me the leadership here. So, you cannot ask questions since you are still such a sinner. You do not get to question me."

Nothing of this felt right to me. I did not respond to Alice when she was in my face telling me all this. I simply sat and listened and quietly determined that I had to find out for myself. Somehow. I had to know if my 101 pounds was really an abomination to the Lord. I had to find out if Alice was no longer a sinner. I had to find out if it was right to only grieve for a day after such a loss as I had suffered.

I stayed with the group for that year, as I had signed on for a year and had to honor that contract. But, I was filled with inexplicable relief when my year was over and could not wait to leave.

Years later, Rocky and Alice had troubles of their own. While they were busy being in charge of us down to our diets and spiritual teachings, Rocky was busy raping some of the young men who had joined the group. He sexually abused countless young men, and Alice knew and hid this sin, all while they were holding themselves up as the righteous ones. The ones who were no longer sinners. The ones whom God had gifted with leadership.

They used their experience and leadership as proof of God's blessings on them, blessings they claimed came from their righteous living. Blessings they claim came as a reward for their obedience to God. Blessings they claim were a result of their own faithfulness.

They were able to keep this abuse quiet even after the group disbanded. A local newspaper in Lake Wales, FL announced their decision to disband, but said, "Officials for the group are not explaining the reasons for the action." Of course they are not going to explain the reasons for the action. They can't bring themselves to say that Rocky Adkins was a pedophile who sexually abused the young men in the group while his wife, Alice, watched and hid the actions.

So, this might be why, when I see people misuse my precious Scriptures and take things out of context to prove some human point or to sell a book, I speak up about it. To this day, others who were involved with The Agape Players are very quiet about what Rocky and Alice did.

I will continue to speak up about spiritual, physical, emotional and all kinds of abuse.
I will speak up.
I realize this is long. Thanks for hanging on to the end.
~Tricia

When Simplifying Gets Complicated

Bill Hybels, in his book, Simplify, talks about living a simplified life, paring down the "overscheduled and overwhelmed web" of our current lives and simplifying things for ourselves. The stated goal is to unclutter our souls. I'm sure Bill has some great ideas on getting organized and living more simply, but I take issue with his use of Scripture as his proof text.

He said, "In my experience, a handful of key practices are vital to keeping my soul clutter-free. These practices help me overcome the barriers that keep me from living the life "to the full"  that Jesus promised in John 10:10."

Oh, my. On this, Bill Hybels is wrong.

John 10:10. In this verse, Jesus said,

" The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy. I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly." 

Jesus is not talking about an over-scheduled, overwhelmed life that has too many appointments going on. He's talking about quantity of life. The context of John 10 is the Good Shepherd. Jesus said He is the Good Shepherd and repeats in the context that He is the Door of the sheep....that anyone who enters by Him will be saved. He said that thieves come only to steal, and to kill and to destroy...and that's when He says He has come that they might have life and have it more abundantly. Abundantly here means quantity. He came that we might have full quantity of life. What is full quantity of life? What is abundant life? Eternal life. That's what Jesus is talking about. Eternal life.

No over-scheduling, overwhelming busyness or anything else can take this away from you. There is nothing that can keep you from living life "to the full" because life to the full is not something you can control. It is the gift of God. It is eternal life. It is the fullest quantity of life.

Life gets more complicated for me when someone misuses Scripture to prove their point. This is tantamount to spiritual abuse because

a) it teaches the reader that they might not get what Jesus promised. Nothing could be further from the truth. Jesus promised abundant life with no strings attached. It is His gift.

b) it teaches that Jesus is inconsistent in His gift because simplifying life is really a first world issue and my brothers and sisters in Christ who barely make it through the day because they live in a refugee camp also have abundant life.

c) it minimizes Christ's accomplishment on the cross because it reduces Him to Someone Who is there to make our lives uncomplicated.

d) it minimizes the suffering and persecution going on around the world today. Look at our brothers and sisters losing their heads for their faith right now! If you think they can simplify their lives on earth, you are wrong, yet they have abundant life because even once they lose their heads, they are still alive.

In Christ, you have abundant life. Period. No exceptions. But, believe me, if you truly live for Him, your life will not be uncomplicated. Living for Him means you will have conflict in life, will be pushed to the edge of your faith, will be tried and tested and made to stand against others if you're going to follow Him. It means you're going to have enemies and a drive to tell others about Him so they can avoid hell, and, believe me, that's complicated. Living for Him means you put others first, even if that means you have to fill your calendar.

Look at the lives of Jesus' disciples in the New Testament. Not one of them got away with an uncluttered, uncomplicated life once they began to follow Christ. Most of them were martyred. Many others were threatened. Many others were imprisoned. Others risked their lives again and again for the sake of the Gospel. Yet they had abundant life....because they are still alive. Their lives are still abundant, more than 2,000 years later. That is life to the full. That is life abundant.

So, please don't fall for this lie that an uncluttered life is an abundant life. Bill Hybels has no business redefining a portion of Scripture to sell another book. If he had left my God out of it, left my precious Scriptures out of it, it might be a good book on organization and simplification. But, instead, he misused Scripture, redefined God's own Words and used them in an absolute wrong way. This makes his teachings null and void. This is spiritual abuse.

In Christ, our souls are not going to be clutter-free, either. Clutter-free living is not the route to peace. Jesus is the only Route to peace. He will give peace because He is peace. You cannot earn His peace or bring it on yourself by following some man-made steps until you feel it. It is there. It is Him. He earned it on that cross. You cannot earn it or get it any other way.  John 14:27; 16:33 and Ephesians 2:14 are just a few verses that tell of His peace. There are so very many more.

Just reading Amazon's 20% free portion of this book complicated my life because I became driven to set it straight and point out this gross error.

Don't allow yourself to be sucked into the idea that you can live a more abundant life through simplification. Instead, throw yourself headlong onto the Savior and watch His peace rule in your heart through His eternal promises. You will stand amazed.

Stop reading "Bible study books" and start reading, really reading, your Bible.
~Tricia

Fight. Pray. Love. Like a Girl

Fight like a girl.

This is a popular saying on social media right now. This idea of fighting like a girl, the fact that girls fight hard and well, is not new. Once, a man said to me after I threw a ball, "You throw like a girl!" I smiled broadly and gave him a big thank you.

Always is trying to make sure everyone thinks fighting like a girl is a positive, good, strong thing. They created this fabulous video to show how they feel that doing anything like a girl means doing it well and being strong. They are on the right track, but this is not new. Jesus Christ was the first Champion of women. He, throughout the generations, has put women in places of high honor and leadership, working for His kingdom.

As Christian women, we are called to be  stedfast (I Peter 5:8 & 9) and unmovable (I Corinthians 15:58). We are told we have power to witness for Christ (Acts 1:8) and to fight the good fight (I Timothy 6:12).  We are told to go and make disciples, teaching all nations. (Matthew 28:18-20). We have God-given strength and power, unmatched and breathtaking in its scope. All we have to do is look within the Scriptures, themselves, and see how Almighty God raised women up time and time again to accomplish His purposes.

*Eve was given dominion over the earth by the Triune God, Himself. (Genesis 1:28)
*Esther had power and fearlessness. (Esther 5:3, 6 and 7:2)
*Deborah was given powers of judgment as she served as the judge over Israel. (Judges 4:40
*King Lemuel's mother had power to instruct him as king without hesitation. (Proverbs 31:1)
*Abigail was not only beautiful, but brilliant as well, and saved King David from committing much bloodshed. (I Samuel 25)
*Abraham was instructed by God to obey Sarah and submit to her wishes. (Genesis 21:12)
*Huldah was sought after as a prophet and she instructed men in the Word of the Lord without hesitation. (II Kings 22:14-20)
*The Great I Am submitted Himself to a woman, His mother, Mary, not only for a human birth, but as one under subjection. He later took responsibility for her as an obedient Son. (John 19:27)
*When the Apostle Paul went to Philippi to plant a church, he went first to the women. (Acts 16)
*Priscilla was a teacher of men, with at least one man she taught showing great success as a result. (Acts 18)
*Anna was a prophet and teacher of all who were in the Temple. (Luke 2:36)
*We are one in Christ...there is neither male nor female. (Galatians 3:28)

There are many more women whose action, wisdom and service in leadership is recorded in Scripture. Yet, given all this evidence of our God seeing women as strong and capable, and putting them in active leadership roles, there are still men who would have you believe otherwise. These prominent men would have you believe that even God, Himself, wants women relegated to a back seat when it comes to any type of leadership at all. They would have you believe that women belong only in the home and that any and all women being used in service to God were exceptions, never the normal expectation. Among these teachers is John McArthur and John Piper. They openly believe and teach that women are not to lead because they are easily deceived and possess a "certain deceive-ability" that men do not and that they ought to stay home and have babies and hope for salvation through their childbearing and obedience to their husbands.

The problem is, this idea is not at all supported in Scripture. These men have taken their own ideas and promoted them as God's. Read for yourself, girls; it's not in there. That women possess a certain deceive-ability is a pure concoction of men; God has never said this. Our God does not feel this way about us.

What God does say is that we are Daughters of Abraham in our own right, meaning without the approval or possession of a husband. (Luke 13:16) We are Daughters of Judah and can rejoice at the Lord's judgment. (Psalm 97:8)

To teach that women are more deceive-able and spiritually weaker than men is to undermine, negate and minimize Christ's work on the cross. His death covered all sin, "far as the curse is found," and therefore, women do not have to carry the stigma of the forbidden fruit any longer. Anyone who minimizes Christ's work on the cross is of the devil.

Instead of believing what these men, and even some women, say about you and your Bible and you and your God, read His Word for yourself. Set aside the "Bible study books" and the commentaries and sit down with the pure, unadulterated Word of God and just see for yourself what He has in store for  you. It will absolutely change your life.

Fight like a girl.
Pray like a girl.
Love like a girl.
~Tricia

3 Things Worship Leaders Can Learn from Taylor Swift

My husband and I enjoy watching The Voice. Because of our tight schedule, we record it on our dvr and watch it later, fast-forwarding through a lot of the talk, all the commercials, and focus just on the performances. We watched it that way until last season when Taylor Swift joined the scene and became an adviser to all the contestants. We didn't fast forward through Taylor's sessions, but listened to what she had to tell the contestants.

We paused the show often to take note of and discuss some of Taylor's points to the performers. Her advice is spot-on and, because we are currently planting a church, we discussed it in light of worship and song leaders in church.

Here are 3 things we think worship and song leaders can learn from Taylor Swift.

1. "Open your eyes; people can't see what you're feeling if your eyes are closed." This is the statement that made us pause the most. We've seen it many times, worship and song leaders standing up on the platform singing with their eyes closed as though they are all alone. While they might really be "feeling" the song, it does not translate that way. It translates as a disconnect. It translates as half-done because perhaps the mom who is trying to keep her kids in tow, or the dad whose child needs to go to the bathroom, or the elderly woman who is trying to balance so she won't have to sit down, or the elderly man whose hearing aid is too loud, can't concentrate. They look up and see a worship leader singing with his or her eyes closed and think maybe they missed something, or that they're supposed to be praying, or that maybe it's a solo. Worship and song leaders, keep your eyes open! You are leading, not performing.

2. "Look at faces, not the wall or floor. Pick a few people and sing directly to them." This one makes a huge difference as well, and it could also apply to preachers. People know when you're not looking at them. They know when you are disconnected from them, and it will show in their response to formal worship. Leading people in worship of the Living God is no small task. Worship and song leaders need to remember that it's people they're leading, not songs. Look at the people. Connect with their eyes. Only then will they see your worship and be compelled to follow. The goal of leading worship is to direct people to God. We can't do that if we're looking at the walls or ceiling.

3. "Get rid of restrictions and distractions." Taylor advised one young man to leave his guitar behind and a young woman to abandon her high heels. She told the young man that his guitar was a security blanket and he'd perform better without it. She told the young woman that her high heels were making her feel like she couldn't keep her balance so she should wear flats or lower heels. Both of those young people took her advice and they both won their competitions.  Worship leaders, if you're distracted by holding a microphone or guitar, put the mic on a stand and stop wearing a guitar. Your ability to lead the people in worship will be greatly improved.

These are just observations, but they come from our own personal experience with worship services over the years. I have served on worship teams and I know the temptation to close my eyes and "feel" the song I'm singing. I have to remember that being on a worship team to lead worship is not about me, it's about Jesus and helping every single person in the congregation see Him. It's about enunciating each word in a song while connecting with the people visually so they will see my intent in my eyes.

Being a worship leader is about leading people, not songs.

Worship.
Lead.
Sing.
Learn
~Tricia

Pedophile in the Pulpit

This article in the Austin Daily Herald shows that justice has finally been served to a horrid pedophile who got away with his crimes for decades. He not only got away with them, he stood up each week in the pulpit, his congregational leaders fully aware of some of his crimes before they even brought him there. By looking the other way, they are guilty of allowing a pedophile to defile the children in their own ministry....their own children! Do they think it can't happen to them?

We knew he had issues and when some of his other sins were found out, we begged and begged the state Baptist leadership to look into him and do their own investigation. They would not. Instead, they actually accused us of "always stirring up trouble." We were not stirring up trouble; we were warning of the trouble already stirred up and worried sick about his victims. I still am worried about them.

Our warnings and pleas for independent investigations went unheard. No one would listen when we told them he had some questionable behaviors that needed investigation. Turns out, many of them already knew and didn't care! They continued to praise him and give him ministry responsibilities.

There are a few other men whom we suspect in that town. We've only had enough solid evidence to warn about one specifically and I'm happy to see that the current leadership of Grace Baptist Church, the church this pedophile was pastor of, has kept this other man out of their nursery so far.

Click here to read the entire article.

I will never be afraid to speak out about pedophiles, even if I go unheard.
I will continue to tip newspapers and get these things in print.
I will continue to warn people so that I might prevent just one more victim.

To his victims, I'm so, so sorry for what he did to you. We did try to stop him. They would not listen. We were stopping him for you. I hope you all feel some relief knowing he's in prison. I hope this gives you a sense of vindication. This is all for you, so that you know he's locked up and can't hurt anyone else, so that you no longer have to fear him in any way.

~Tricia

First, Become a Prostitute

Many people often see patterns in Scripture that they interpret as "Biblical principles." They claim that these principles will help people live a God-pleasing life and have success in their Christian walk. It sounds so good. It sounds so promising. It sounds so incredibly right that these people write books about these principles, giving their readers step-by-step instructions to follow to get to their great Christian life. And from those book sales, they live a luxurious, "favored-by-God" life. Or so they say.

I wanted to take a look at a passage of Scripture that shows a pattern for sure success with God. His favor was found all over this passage and in the life of one woman and her family in particular. Her principles were so successful that she's even an earthly ancestor of Christ, Himself. Who would not want that level of success? Who would not want to be so remembered? Everyone I know would strive toward that level of success in their walk with God.

Let's get started. Let's look closely at her life and see why God's favor was with her so heavily. Let's discover the principles that led to her success.

Our Scripture passage is found in Joshua chapter 2, then chapter 6 verses 17, 23 & 25. The following observations are brief and I encourage you to read the passages for yourself to find more details. I'm highlighting three Biblical principles taken from this passage for your ease in following and clarity in understanding.

Her name: Rahab
Her occupation: Prostitution

Your first step in seeing success and favor with God is to become a prostitute. This clearly put Rahab in a great position to receive spies. Had she not been a prostitute, she would not have been a likely target for some foreign spies to feel comfortable around. Certainly her occupation served her well and helped her secure a solid position with those men. This principle is under-used in our society.

Her visitors: Spies
Her solution: Lie and deceive

Your second step in seeing success and favor with God is to lie. The Biblical principle we can take away from her lies is that they worked. Clearly, since they are recorded in Scripture and not condemned, they are a viable option for everyone even today. When we fail to recognize and use all the principles given to us, we fail to see God's favor on our lives. Her prostitution is never condemned, either, by the way.

Her dilemma: An invasion
Her tactic: Bargain for her and her family's sake.

Your third step in seeing success and favor with God is to strike a bargain with someone in charge, working solely for your own survival and the survival of your family. Forget everyone else; this is just for you. Her bargaining, I might add, was based on the fact that she had lied for these men, giving her clear bargaining chips to use to her advantage.

Rahab was mentioned again in the New Testament, in Hebrews 11:31 and James 2:25. Clearly the principles she lived by worked. What a legacy! Why is no one on her bandwagon?

This practice of seeing patterns of Biblical principles practiced throughout Scripture is secular humanism at its best.

This entire blog post is satire. (Please realize that I do not condone prostitution, lying or any other form of sin and ungodliness.  I wrote this to show the ludicrousness of assigning certain passages of Scripture as patterns for "Biblical principles" while ignoring others.)

Patterns of human behavior throughout Scripture are all badly flawed. Sin is shown forth from one end of the human spectrum to the other. Do you want a Biblical principle to follow?

Look to Jesus, the Author and Finisher of your faith....Hebrews 12:2. Read on through verse 3. It will take your breath away.

Stop worshiping human behavior and throw yourself on His mercy.
For His mercy endures forever.

~Tricia

A Culture of Rape in the Church

It's interesting to me that a secular movie network would choose to produce movies about Biblical characters. Lifetime recently aired a movie entitled The Red Tent, depicting the story of Dinah from Genesis 34. The movie did not get the story right by a long shot, but it did raise awareness. I'll trust you to read the entire chapter in your Bible; do not depend on script writers for theology or Biblical content. Here, for the sake of time and space, I'll summarize.

Dinah was the daughter of Jacob and Leah. The Bible tells us that she "went out to see the women of the land" they lived in. While she was out, Shechem, the son of Hamor the Hivite,  the prince of the land, saw her, seized her and raped her. He then said he loved her and asked for her hand in marriage.

Her father waited till her brothers came in from the fields, then told them what had happened. They were angry, and rightly so; their sister had been raped. Shechem continued pursuing Dinah's father for her hand, then pursued her brothers. Shechem's father, Hamor, pled with them on his behalf.

Finally, Dinah's brothers came up with a plan. They deceitfully agreed to give their sister to him in marriage and promised to "become one people" with the people of that city (verse 16). The one condition was that the men of the city get circumcised, saying it would be "disgraceful" to give their sister to one who was uncircumcised. So, Hamor and Shechem agreed to this plan and convinced the men of their city to agree to it as well. They wasted no time.

All the men of the city had agreed to be circumcised and were lined up to get the deed done. It takes time to heal from such a thing and on the 3rd day, when they were too sore to fight back, Dinah's brothers, Simeon and Levi, killed them all, took their wives and children and plundered their city.
They got justice for their sister.

Read the entire account, including how their father reacted to the brothers' acts of justice, in Genesis 34.

In studying this passage, I decided to do something I don't normally do. I decided to read a few commentaries on the passage. I read them for one reason and one reason only; I wanted to see what male commentators had to say about the rape of a woman.  (I do not consider commentaries to be Bible study tools and am actually amazed that some people do.) The tragedy of this story is the rape.

I was absolutely astounded that the vast majority of commentators blamed the rape on Dinah! In chapter 2 of the Alphabetical Exposition of the Bible published by Zondervan in 1988, one unnamed commentator said, "Had Dinah been content to remain a 'keeper at home' (Titus 2:5), a terrible massacre would have been averted, but her desire for novelty and forbidden company spelled disaster." No. This commentator is completely wrong. #1, Dinah could not read Titus 2:5 because it was not yet written, nor does it apply here. This is a gross misuse of Scripture. #2, the Bible does not indicate on any level that Dinah's going out to see the women of the land was wrong or sinful. It simply states that she went. #3, this commentator had the nerve to even blame the massacre on Dinah! She didn't massacre these men, nor did she come up with the plan to do so. #4, The sin here was rape! 

Matthew Henry said, "Young persons, especially females, are never so safe and well off as under the care of pious parents. Their own ignorance, and the flattery and artifices of designing, wicked people, who are ever laying snares for them, expose them to great danger. They are their own enemies if they desire to go abroad, especially alone, among strangers to true religion....Indulged children, like Dinah, often become a grief and shame to their families. She went to see the daughters of the land.....yet that was not all, she went to be seen, too." While Matthew Henry might seem to wax eloquent here, he's dead wrong. The Bible does not tell us she went to be seen. The Bible does not tell us that her parents objected to her going. The Bible does not tell us that Dinah was indulged. The sin here is rape!

The Pulpit Commentary states, "Dinah paid the full penalty of her carelessness." NO! The Bible does not tell us she was careless. She suffered rape. She was not responsible for what happened to her. She was a victim. The sin here is rape!

Why do these and other commentators blame Dinah for what happened? This tendency to blame a woman when she is raped is not confined to the 20th and 21st centuries. Many of the commentators I read wrote their works hundreds of years ago. Nearly all of them blamed Dinah in some way.

People, this has to stop. The Bible does not chastise Dinah. There is no record of her parents chastising her. For all we know, Dinah went out many times in the same way and no rape occurred. The sin is rape. Dinah is not responsible. Shechem is responsible; the commentators should be condemning him, not Dinah.

This way of thinking, to blame the victim in some way, fuels a culture of rape and it's even happening within the church. Women are not taken seriously, are minimized and set aside, them blamed for the sinful, disgraceful acts of men. Shame on these commentators. What I discovered through this brief research on what they had to say about Dinah is completely disgusting.

So, what's a girl to do? Stay inside her parents' house until her wedding day? Wear a Burqa with a screen in front of her face so she won't "tempt" a man or dare to be seen? Are we women such a threat to men that they cannot control themselves on any level and we are to be blamed if some man rapes us? Are we to believe that we bring shame on our families if someone commits any other crime against us? What about women who don't marry? Are they to be treated as undeserving spinsters and locked away in their father's house until he dies, then go live with a brother or uncle? Oh, my, how far this awful thinking could go.

These commentators are wrong. Young men, beware, commentators like this are trying to seduce you into thinking that if you lose control of your impulses, it's perfectly fine because it's a girl's fault. You have the power; she bares the shame.

This makes me want to throw up. I have raised five honorable sons. They all respect women, defend women and treat women as equals. They do not think they are better than women or superior to women, nor are they threatened by women. My married sons are married to strong women who can hold their own and they do not need to depend on their husbands, my sons, for their womanhood or validation as a person on this planet, nor their spiritual go-between in their relationship with Christ. My three daughters, two of whom are married, are strong women who will speak their mind and hold to their own opinions even if they disagree with their husbands, or their dad, or anyone else. As their mom, I will forever defend and applaud them for doing so.

Parents, raise your sons to respect women and treat them as equals. Not "equal but different," but full equals. Raise your daughters to be strong women who take no nonsense from anyone. Never berate a little girl for being too bold or outspoken or independent. Jesus surrounded Himself with strong women who not only traveled with Him, but supported Him from their own independent resources. He was not afraid to talk to women and have friendships with women. He did not tell women what to wear or what to feel, nor did He hold women responsible for the sins of men.

If you want to study your Bible, then put the commentators away in a box out of sight, for they are not enhancing your study; they are hindering it and polluting it with the religion of Secular Humanism. Study your Bible, using the Bible as your Source. Then you will know the Truth and the Truth will set you free. John 8:31 & 32 says, "So Jesus said to the Jews who had believed Him, 'If you abide in my word, you are truly my disciples, and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.'" He did not say, "If you faithfully read commentators." 

It's the Word of God that changes lives, not someone's comments on the Word. 

Get this. Understand this.

Settle for nothing less than the pure Word of God. 

~Tricia